Reflection- 30 before 30 list this year

23:14:00 Karen Li 0 Comments

I've ticked another item off my 30 before 30 list right before my birthday. And before the end of the month, I should have submitted my PhD. Finally. It's like a baby that has been stuck with me forever.

The 30 before 30 list was set a few years ago. I had a reunion with overseas members of my youth group about said list. I asked them what would the things be they would put on their list. They suggested that things that mattered then would matter less now, and would certainly matter less in 2 years time. There is wisdom in their response. Our goals, continue to evolve. Some goals get achieved and left behind. Other goals are set but because of life circumstances they no longer matter.

Are there still things on my list that I think I can still achieve before I am 30? I have ticked off 13 of the 30 items. I am confident that the Phd will disappear from the list soon. I have already lost 4 kg compared to last year, and I am currently within the healthy BMI range. Some things on my list are about experiences or travel: Haibun, swimming with dolphins, missions trip, northern lights, shower in a waterfall, eat at a hatted restaurant. And these don't matter to me that much anymore. I wouldn't fee like a failure if I didn't accomplish these things. Some things seem a bit out of reach or beyond my control: fall in love, best friends baptism. Some things are achievable if I really really really wanted to: finish a half marathon, run 10km in under an hour, improve photography and cooking skills, parallel park, guitar. But the question is, are these things still important to me?

Sitting here with 2 years to go will 30, will I make a significantly different list? Have I learned not to be overly ambitious? My short term goals are just to do my best for my clients, finish my PhD. My medium term goals is to help train leaders for worship team. My longer term goals are not so much things that I control. 2 years ago I would have dreamed a different life for today. But I believe God is in control. Through the ups and downs, the excitements and disappointments, the successes and failures, he is in control.
I have done way less than I thought I would. But I have experienced way more than I thought would be possible. 
So I sit here hopeful at what the next 2 years will bring. I may fall in love, but I may fall out of love. I may become financially independent or completely broke. I may stay or I may go. The possibilities are scary and exciting at the same time.

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